Tuesday 3 May 2011

Love in the form of hate...

Hey bloggers,

Is there anyone that has a strong hatred towards you for no apparent reason?  Is there anyone you feel strong hatred towards for no apparent reason?

'Love in the form of hate can guide and influence us the greatest.'

Everybody is a critic!  If people are not criticising the way you look, it is the way you smell, the way you act, the way you eat or maybe even the way you speak.  Though all of these criticisms stent from a similar source: that is that we tend to criticise people based on our own opinion of perfect and maybe even our own fears.  We may hate the idea of having a big nose, so notice other people who have big noses and maybe outwardly criticise them for it.  What has any of this got to do with love and hate you may ask?  Well, sometimes we criticise people we hate because we love them!

It is best to take criticism as an opportunity to analyse people I find.  For example: if they tell you that you’re too much of an attention seeker, perhaps they feel they lack attention?  They love attention but hate you as you get it.  There are obviously many different situations this can happen in, but sometimes this is the case.  Another example, probably more understandable, is whereby people hate others for the way they look.  Perhaps they may not feel very secure about their looks so hate people they believe to be good looking.  Or maybe someone is so confident in their looks that they do not feel as though they have much time for people they view as lacking in the looks department. 

Although criticism is part of nature, should we outwardly do it and make judgement?  When people criticise me, I tend to take it as an opportunity to psychoanalyse them.  Many of us do this without even thinking about it so; if you don't want to be judged, don't let everyone know you’re judging!  I will make it a pretext, based on criticism, to perhaps dull down the things people dislike about me when I am around them.  This is not changing who I am; it is simply taking advantage of the adaptive personality I have acquired through various situations and work I have been in.  Adaptation is the key to mastering people I feel.  Everyone has a different idea of humour, tolerance, personality and annoyance etc so, why not take advantage of our ability to adapt too many situations and alter certain aspects of our personality to suit the situation or person we are in contact with?

I do know that many people do not want to befriend everyone they see and that is obviously not a problem.  It is simply a different outlook on life.  We are all built for different purposes and therefore do not all need to befriend everyone.  Though, I do feel that sometimes the things we love we hate.  What I mean by that is that if someone really wants something that someone else has, they will hate the person who has it.  This is human nature and is the basis of jealousy.  In fact, high Buddhists teach that two of the three delusions in life are hatred and desire.  High Buddhists are some of the most relaxed people you can ever meet and it is obvious why when they have learnt to cut out want and hatred in life.  These two things can lead to great depression and great amounts of negativity to one's life.  So, instead of hating someone for having something we love, we should just be happy for them or even try to look at what we already have as you don't know what you've got until it is gone!

So, what do you think?  Hatred is the biggest form of love and can criticism really allow us to analyse people?  Let me know what you think in the comments below and check the appropriate box please.  Follow me here or on Twitter @

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